What an exhausting day… Last night I didn’t sleep well, I guess because I was so nervous about today. I remember right after I had M, and it was time to return back to work, I would seriously have panic attacks almost every day. That is what is has been like this week… If you have ever had panic attacks, you know how horrible they are! Tuesday after we went to the school to get M enrolled we went and had a bite to eat before I had to go to work, and I remember sitting there, and all the sudden I got sick to my stomach, my heart was pounding, and all I wanted to do was block out everything around me. It took everything I had to make it home, trying to hurry up to take something for my anxiety. Today was pretty much a repeat of Tuesday. At first I was fine, and M seemed to do really well while we were at the school this morning. It wasn’t long after we left, that my husband sends me text letting me know that M had gotten sick and he was going to have to go get him. My heart dropped… I don’t think I was truly ready for this step. It hurts not being able to be the one that is there for your baby. My husband said when he got to the school M was calling out for me… As I’m sitting at my desk at work, my eyes are filling up with tears. The teachers told my husband he cried for 20 minutes after we left him this morning. My poor baby hasn’t ever been left like that before. I wonder what was going through his mind. I was so glad to know he was back home, where he belongs. And I was even happier, when he was in my arms.
Baby boy, mama sure does love you!
The first day wasn’t all that it was hyped up to be… All the prep that went into it, hoping for it to be a great day. The little man did have some fun I believe, but I know he was extremely happy to be home amongst his belongings. I know his sissy and daddy were glad to have him home also. I can’t believe we have to do this again next week. Maybe by then, we will be ready to give it another try. I just never thought it would be this hard.
Baby boy has no idea what is getting ready to happen!
It well get easier, but today it was rough on everyone…
Both kids ended up getting sick today… It has been a pretty rough day for the husband. But whatever it was that they had has passed. This evening they both seem to be feeling better. Not sure if it was nerves, I know sissy was pretty upset this morning when we left without bubba. She seriously
screamed cried the entire way home. And my husband said she was pretty fussy all day, until after she woke from her afternoon nap, and had her brother to wake up too. This has truly been a rough day for everyone involved… My sweet babies are in bed, and that is where I need to be. I would love a goodnights sleep, my body and mind need it. I wish my brain had a stop or mute button!
Look at that poor face, sissy was so upset! I think she might have taken it harder than anyone else! But then again, she is the drama queen of our house… Mama loves you sweet girl!
Tomorrow is Friday, and I’m looking forward to the weekend!
Goodnight sweet angels!