i'm perfectly, imperfect...: At the point of exploding...

The past few days I have been at the point of exploding! I’m so stressed, frustrated and overwhelmed that I don’t know how to process everything. And due to the nonstop pain, I’m grumpy around the clock. Every time I turn around, I’m yelling at someone about something. The procedure from Monday didn’t take, so I had to go in today for another procedure, this time the block did work, but due to the doctor having to go in at three different spots, I’m pretty sore. And I’m tired of being sore, and being in pain, I want it ALL to go away.

That’s all I have, all I want to do is put my head in a pillow and scream, or scream at anyone that looks at me. This is so not my personality, or who I am. And all I want is the old me back, the one that loves to laugh and be goofy and loud. And right now, I’m having a hard time finding that person, and it makes me want to cry, because all I can think about is the pain, and how it is and has taken over my life. As the doctors are trying to get the pain under control, it will never be completely gone. But hearing over and over again, that I will always be in some sort of pain, just sends me over the edge, every time one of them says it.

It’s going to be a lovely weekend around this house. I have to take it easy for the next few days, so the weekend help has arrived to help with the kiddos. I’m sure my Aunt & Uncle were hoping the weekend stays were over with, surprise they aren’t. But the kiddos are very excited to have them here...

Happy Friday, and cheers to a fabulous extremely hot weekend. Here's to tomorrow being a better day, and me being in a better mood.